What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

thumb_up thumb_down -16

They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? depends on how thin you can slice them.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats black and white and red all over? A chopped up dalmation...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

thumb_up thumb_down -18

There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-gaurds, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Froghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Froghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops