How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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whats the stage after cancer? you die

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

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What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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