what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

A dyslexic athiest..."'There is no Dog!"

My jeans

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...