roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

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Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

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why cant ben cry, because i gorged his eyes out with a popsickle stick.....

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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What's worse than getting sockson your birthday? Getting cancer on your birthday.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

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And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than that? Two dead babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than that? Two dead trees naild to a baby.

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Your girlfriend.

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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Why did the plane crash? The Pilot Wash a Loaf of Bread

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What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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What did man who had diarrhea say to the other man? "I have to go to the toilet."

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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Get on the boat.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops