There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

Cripples are lame.

What happens when you give a fat man scissors? He cuts off the foreskin of your penis.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

Hello

I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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