How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

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What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

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Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops