I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

A dancer walks into a barre

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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