What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

cool

Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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