Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

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Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

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Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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A black man walks out of a police station

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

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No

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

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Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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