Why are all black people fast? because all the slow ones are in jail.

Uh, Liz, he is staring at the screen... He says you are right and knows, so he cant get mad, ill trust you both, but it better work, or this one is on me. Oh by the way, yeah he is eating, sorry its late here, and I am the only nurse here about now Ironically this place is full of doctors but they dont seem to give a crap about the man that pays their checks. Doctors said no, Nero said "you are fired" Doctor changes his opinion, glad to see he is taking charge around here, I am just worried about his sleep, he is beginning to halucinate and I doubt any stimulants will help. But fine, ill trust you, sorry, really shaking my boots here, I really do not want to, but this is not about me.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

Why did the Mr. bunny play the piano? - His wife Lannette was ill, and her last wish before she died was for him to.

My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

Donald Trump

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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