Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

What did the man say before he got stabbed? What are you going to do, stab me?

An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde go on vacation in Hawaii. They plan to swim to the next island. The brunette and redhead do it with no problem. The blonde swims halfway and realizes she is tired. She continues to swim straight ahead knowing her friends are already at the next island.

Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

Parent: Please, my son have sinned. Please cleanse him from his sins. Priest: Hmmm, it may be hard to cleanse him from his demons. You may leave him in my car today. We shall enter the dark chambers where we will battle your demons Parent: Thankyou Priest: Alone, in the dark. It will be painful for him, but he shall be cleansed *wink* Parent: whut?

KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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