A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

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If Bob has 65 sweets and he eats 57 how many does he have? Bob has diabetes. He has high blood sugar, either because the body does not produce enough insulin, or because cells do not respond to the insulin that is produced.

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Q: What's the difference between Catholism and Judiasm? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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Where did Jimmy go during the bombing? An underground shelter where he would be kept from harm.

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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What is the difference?

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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Anti - Jokes. com

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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