Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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Yo mamma is SO fat, she is classified as fat.

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I like that, but why am I happy?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops