What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

How does Justin Bieber remove a condom? he farts

What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

deez nuts

A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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