A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

thumb_up thumb_down +6

The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops