Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

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Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Things that have changed since I was a kid. Turtles: My time, awesome. Today: Shredder is a human which is not a human but actually a Krang, but his daughter which is not his daughter because he is a freaking krang, has a sex thing for Leonardo which is a turtle (the blue one, whatever his name is). Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: My time? Well it was awesome back then, fine I admit it, I might have been a bit biased but still, I enjoyed the hell out of it, there where five rangers and yeah that Asian bitch that gave me a boner as a kid made a green one which she giftwrapped to the rest of the team, then some white ranger showed up... But I never watched anything with the white guy, I had lots interest years ago by then (Still play that fighting game for the Snes and thats why I know there is a fucking white ranger... And deathbattle okay) Today: Power Rangers Neon, Power Rangers Tetris, Power Rangers Ultra Power, Power Rangers Sexfighters, Power Rangers Nazi, Power Rangers Texas Rangers, Power Rangers Color, Power Rangers Multiforce Orbital Neo Neon.... And thats just like 03 percent of the variants right? Moral: As a kid we always had a lol when the Asian chick turned into Yellow ranger and did a split kick, which kinda revealed she had a massive dick between her legs... Later we understood that she was a he and that the Ranger Segments are recorded in Japan... Probably by a Hermafrodite... Nah, a guy fine. Oh, and we always lolled at how "gay" the original blue ranger acted he was supposed to be Nerd but I was like eight and was like "lol he just seems gay"... Just for it to turn out that he quit the series because supposedly the rest of the actors mocked him for being gay, Wow thats... Weird.

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Maths.

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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how old is god? i don't know thats why i'm asking you. by: Brennan pickrell

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person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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You are the most beautiful person in the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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