What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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So i broke up with my girl, here her number... SIKE!! ITS THE WRONG NUMBAHHH!!!

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So a bar walks into a man...

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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Whats 9 plus 10 ... WHO FREAKIN CARES! STUPID.

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YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

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You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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sadf

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops