If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

How many fingers am i holding up? 4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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