Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

Max Head fingered himself, HAH

What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

What do you call someone who's sad? A depressed person

What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

What do you call a black women serving 60 years in prison? A prisoner.

why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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