Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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womans having rights.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

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Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

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what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

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what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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