What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

Balls

Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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