what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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what does idk mean? i dont know!! nobody knows!!

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Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

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My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

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Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it accidentally got out of it's pen. the farmer got very mad at the chicken for getting out, and very vicous-like, yelled at the chicken, causing it to get scared, and run to the other side. and that, is why the chicken crossed the road.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

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knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops