Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

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Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

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roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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