My jeans

Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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so today i took a poop. hehe

Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

jess always squints her eyes when making a point

Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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