A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

hello

what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer..... Just Kidding! He got a bike!

Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What do you call 4 Mexicans at the bottom of the ocean? Cuatro sinco.

What's big and messy? A big mess

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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