What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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Knock knock Who's there? Guess who. You have 4 options: A. Jeremy Stevens B. Donald Jefferson C. Richard Gillespie D. Paul Faggot Um A? Nope, the correct answer is D. Paul Faggot Oh hi Paul, come in.

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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