Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

How High is a Chinese man

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, then they probably won't hear the lumberjack's cries for help either.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

Why did the sky turn gray? Yes because she thought it meant a quarterback.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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