how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

Wow! I've seen this joke before!

that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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