Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

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Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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