What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

I guess we will have to see, if I where to one day use my ways of thinking with the intention to become the most corrupt politician of them all, do you think I would succeed?

Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

Q: What say one therapist to a friend? A: I'm the rapist

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

Want to know a joke? There is no joke.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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