Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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Two chemist walk into a bar. The Bartender ask them what they want. The first chemist says he wants H20. The second chemist laughs and says he wants H20 too. Then he dies.

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Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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What's the most famous anti-joke? This one.

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Knock Knock Whos There Policeman Policeman who Please open then door your fathers been in a terrible car accident

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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David shut the fuck up your cat has asthma and i dropped a weight on its little fucking head that pikey should of drowned it furthermore your sister looks like a greasy alien

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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your mom.

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Why did the black man have sex with the white woman? Because they were married.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the farmer let him out, and he found a road to cross!

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

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welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Why was the little boy cold? Cause he was traped In a fridge

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a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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