like this or you will die at some point in your life

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

You want to hear a joke? Republican

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

Why black people are so good at football? Because they have white feet.

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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