What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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noah is a scrub jungle

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what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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Charlie Sheen

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What are annoying? Ads.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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