Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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why was justin sad? his family was murdered

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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