How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

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George W. Bush

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

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Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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