What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

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Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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And now a word from our sponsors

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Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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Suicide is never the answer. Unless you ask me what I contemplated after I found out that my family was killed in a horrific traffic accident.

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Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

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what do i refer too White people = Business Yellow People = Smart Black People = Drug Smugglers, Terrorists, Rapists etc

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Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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