Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

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the WNBA.

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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A Hispanic man, an African woman, and a Caucasian man walk into a bar. No one wins this round of "Racial Equality Appreciation Day's" game of limbo.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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