Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

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What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

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What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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One day an irishman walked into a bar. he started to show off his accent when a nicely dressed lady said to him, "are you from ireland?". "AYE" said the irshman. " what part of ireland are you from?" drunk, the irishman replied "uh downtown" then the woman said, " did you come here alone?" then he replied"no i didn't come here a'lone.....DONKEY!!!"

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There is a asian, mexican and a blonde boy at school. Every day they each get the same food for lunch. The asian always got noodles. The mexican a taco. the blonde boy got pb and j. They decide if they get this lunch again, they will jump off a cliff. The next day they get the same lunch and jump off a cliff. At their funeral the asian mom says " if i had known, i would have made her sushi." the mexican mom says " i would have made her a burrito." The blonde's dad say "hey don't look at me, he makes his own lunch."

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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