Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

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Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

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your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

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Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

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Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

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What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

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Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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