Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to his barber? ????? ??? ?????? ??? ?????, which, in their native language means, I would like to get a haircut.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

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25

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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A japanese man enters a Honda dealership and is approached by an eager salesman. The salesman shows him a few models and then asks him curiously "What do they call Honda in Japan?" The japanese man answered "Honda"

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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A guy finds a genie bottle. He rubs it. A genie appears and grant him 3 wishes. He wishes for a splendid woman, a lot of money, and a house.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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Sarah Palin.

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

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why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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