What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

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Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

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What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

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what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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how do you delete your joke off anti-joke? you don't.

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why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

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During a boxing match, a white man faces an Asian. The Asian loses. Next the white man faces a Mexican. The Mexican also loses. Now the white man faces a black man. "Aw screw it!"

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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