How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

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What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

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There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

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Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

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What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

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Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

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yo mama so ugly she made a happy meal frown.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

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who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

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What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

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Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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