What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

womens rights.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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