What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

A baby seal walks into a club. :|

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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