What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops