What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black man standing on a podium? Slave trade

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

thumb_up thumb_down -11

y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, and they don't have to be blonde, anyone can screw in a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops