- Anti Joke

Chuck Norris and 2 other cowboys were out in the old west. After a long day of travel in the desert, the three of them set up camp for the night. Having sat around their fire silently for some time, the first of the cowboys decided to speak up. "You know," he said, "I believe I am the manliest man here! Why, this one time I was riding all alone through the desert on my manly horse when I stumbled upon a town that had no name. Upon entering the town, I realized that the townspeople were in a panic. Everyone was fleeing for their lives and screaming. So I grabbed the nearest woman to me around the neck and demanded of her, 'What the hell is going on around here?!!!' The woman, terrified, only managed to stammer and point. Low and behold, there was a wild bull skewering people through the heart. So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and grabbed the bull by the horns and looked him straight in the eyes, broke his neck, crushed his testicles, rammed my fist into his chest, pulled out his heart and ate it! That is how much of a man I am!" There was silence quite for a while. Soon the other cowboy cleared his voice and said: "You, know, that's pretty good, but I am more of a man than that! Why, this one time, me and a few of my manly buddies were off on a horse trip. I was bringing up the rear of the line when all of a sudden I heard a commotion at the front of the line. Kicking my fine horse with my spurs, I raced ahead to see what was the matter. Low and behold, there was a twenty-foot rattler that had consumed my friend whole! So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and ran over to the snake, grabbed him around the neck, crushed his testicles, bit off his head, sucked the venom from its cold, lifeless body and then spit it upon the dry ground like acid! That is how much of a man I am!" After this, there was another silence. The two cowboys looked one another over, each recognizing the other to be a fine specimen of what it is to be a man. They then both patiently waited to hear Chuck Norris' response. But there was only silence. Off in the distance an owl hooted. A coyote howled. Still, silence. Chuck Norris didn't say a word; he merely continued to sit calmly and stir the coals of the fire with his penis.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

What happens when a blind man walking crashes in to man that's talking to his gang ? He wakes up in a ditch

Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

why did the blue berry cross the road

baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

What's blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath

XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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