how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

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Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

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Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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Your girlfriend.

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

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How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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What did the little girl get for Christmas? A pipe bomb

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

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How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

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Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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