Roses are blue violets are red pull down ur pants and get in my bed :D

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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...Jack Vale

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Connor "Rusty" McLeod

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I dislike old people.

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Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

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If life throws you lemons Catch them

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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What happened at the finish line of the marathon? People collapsed in exhaustion, it was a marathon.

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What what In the butt

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That's what he said.

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what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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