What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

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A Christian and a Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says "What'll you two have to drink?" The Christian says "I'll have a beer." and get this, the Jew says................................"I'll have a beer too."

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Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

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how to you kill an Irish midget? You don't as murder is illegal and discriminating against a certain type of person is racist.

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option 1, minecraft VS option 2, friends

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guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

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Jasper sucks.

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A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

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Q. How do you make a blonde sad? A. Tell her that her entire family died in an accident.

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Chuck Norris died.

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arse

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Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

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whats funny and has four wheels? A handicapped 11 year old boy getting raped by his father

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Why did Madelyn leave the space next ot the computer? Because her hat got tooken from her.

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A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

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Knock knock! Yes?

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Baaaaaaahhhhhh

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What did the unintelligent sports jock say to the band geek. Hey.

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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What is yellow and sleeps alone? Yoko Ono.

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How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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