What did the farmer say when he lost his donkey? "Oh no, my donkey is my livelihood and the only means I have of supporting my family. Now, we shall surely starve."

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I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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Why did the doctor wear glasses? Because he was a whale.

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thomas hall= fuckin dikc

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A joke

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q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

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The WNBA.

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold their head under water.

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What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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who just made fun of katie matt

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Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

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What is a grammatically incorrect equestrian? An stallion.

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

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Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

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Why are haikus dumb Because they are just stupid Get it a haiku It is a haiku hashaha

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What did the convicted child molester say to the little girl? Nothing, they cut his tongue out in prison.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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