Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

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How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

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What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

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knock knock you may come in

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

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He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

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Freedom of Speech

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What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

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What did Joel say to the mouse. We're both dead mouses.

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What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

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What did the Muslim do when he was in a big American crowd? He was socializing.

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A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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justin littleton. nuff said

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Why did the man go to jail? He abused and later murdered his spouse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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