what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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No joke.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

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Why are haikus dumb Because they are just stupid Get it a haiku It is a haiku hashaha

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Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

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Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

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What is Jason? Black.

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What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

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Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

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Is Carly smart? No.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

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So one time this woman was learning...

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Womens Sports

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Womens rights.

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whats the difference between a white man and a black man? I like cake

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Yo' mama's so fat, she has difficulty finding clothes that fit

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

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how do you stop a train? you cant..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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