This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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Knock knock! Yes?

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What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

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What did michael J. Fox say when someone asked him to play catch? "sorry, I'm busy".

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A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

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Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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Yo' mama's so fat, she has difficulty finding clothes that fit

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What is yellow and sleeps alone? Yoko Ono.

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Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

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Three black men go to the basketball courts one day hoping to play some ball. On the way there they see a homeless man with a sign that says "Homeless. Anything will help." However, since they were on there way to play ball, none of them found it necessary to bring cash, thus resulting in them walking by the homeless man without giving him any money.

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Hitler

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? who cares even if they could screw it in it wouldnt work because there to poor to aford electricity

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What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

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A duck walked up to a bad hearing drug dealer, and dealer asked duck, "What you do want?" A duck said, "Quack!" So dealer gave duck a crack

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why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

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Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

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What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

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A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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