- Anti Joke

What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

Knock, Knock Who's there? The Johnson Family was then heard on the morning news for letting a murderer into their home before being brutally killed.

why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

Why? Because.

A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

What's long and black? A long and black object.

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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