Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

whats got two legs and cant walk a paraplegic

Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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