Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops