Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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Neither have I, nobody knew him.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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Knock knock who's there?... a stupid punchline because the door is imaginary and I am just wasting your time telling a knock knock joke

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Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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Q: Why did the grand mother drop her cane? A: She got pused out a window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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