A dancer walks into a barre

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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Charlie Sheen

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My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

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what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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