what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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A van drives into a car.

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Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

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What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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