Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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THEN WHO WAS FONE?

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Ask me if I care. Do you care? No.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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once upon a time jess was happy this once upon a time was a very long time ago, BABADOOK !

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Q: Why did the black man die poor? A: Because he was financially irresponsible and wasted the millions left to him by his father fueling his alcohol addiction, slowly grinding away at his organs until he died of cirrhosis of the liver.

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why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

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Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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