Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

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An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

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I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

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A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

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Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

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4501 3346 1687 2292 david0209. never do this.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

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A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

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What did the American man say to his brother right before his brother's wedding? You should not get married because most likely your marriage will end in a horrible divorice, which will ruin the rest of your pathetic life.

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(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

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What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops