Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

Why did the old man die? He was old.

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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