Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

i'm hard

What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

Your mom.

Ask me if I care. Do you care? No.

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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