Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face is so ugly it belongs in a zoo, but dont be sad, i forgot the rest, so you wont feel really bad. I need a rhyme, treasure chest.

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a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

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I'm Polish.

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops