what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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