What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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What did Larry do when little Billys baseball crashed through his window? He raped and murdered little Billy for Larry has raped and murdered many children.

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What did one pig say to the other pig while sitting in the bathtub? No thanks I already have a typewriter.

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whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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don't do anything i wouldn't do first

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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Paris Hilton spend 2 whole days in the slammer due to possesion of narcotics. I would have gotten 20 to life... no... it's not funny...

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

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womans having rights.

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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Once ther was a happy little boy and he was just playing with his dinosaur when he was hit by the school bus that was supposed to take him to school. The End

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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