What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Do You Know You Have Cancer?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A dyslexic man walked into a bra

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is my grandpa always so grumpy? Because he has diabetes and life is very difficult for him.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops