How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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