Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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