- Anti Joke

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: locks door NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! opens door NEXT!

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

bite me

pobody's nerfect

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: locks door NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! opens door NEXT!

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

bite me

pobody's nerfect

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: locks door NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! opens door NEXT!