How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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