how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

How do you make an Indian explode? Push the red button

why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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