why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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Pain Olympics.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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