Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

In soviet Russia...things are different

Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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