what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

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have u seen helen kellers dad? A: neither has she

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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A blonde is walking down the road, and she sees a sign saying STOP. She carries on walking. As a pedestrian, the sign does not apply to her.

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

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What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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