What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

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A man goes in to a town on Friday, stays there for 3 days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? He's lying,

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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A black man and a mexican jump off a building at the same time, who lands first? Who cares?

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Q: why are anti-jokes tasteless? A: because they have no flavoure

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

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You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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What do you call a black man? A normal human being

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

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why does osama bin ladens death make me happy? because he was the leader of alkida and created many threats to the u.s. thus the death is ending this creating more freedom. (OSAMA LIKES PENIS!!)

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Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops