How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

What's wrong with you? I have no idea.

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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