How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red Violets are blue Deez nuts Ha goteem

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

thumb_up thumb_down -18

ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

asians have slitted eyes lol

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops