A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

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How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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Knock, Knock Who's there It's me open up the D#### door it's me open up the D#### door, who? just open the door this is not a fricken knock knock joke.

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

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Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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you will like this because i am black.

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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Potassium? K.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops