Why does Joel get so many numbers from girls? Because he asks for them nicely.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why do Mexicans always have heart burn? Because the food is spicy.

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

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How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops