Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

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Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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