A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

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What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

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What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

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What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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what's funnier than the holocaust. If it happened again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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