What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

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What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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Why did the puerto rican cross the road? To get back to his country, but then he realized there wasn't a road then fell in the ocean and drowned.

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

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Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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What did the cow say to his family before he left the house? goodbye, because he was going to the slaughter house to get killed for meat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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