Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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The easter bunny should be a platypus. Bunnies do not lay eggs. Platypuses do, however, and are the only mammals that lay eggs.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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a black hispanic and asian man jump off a cliff they all die and their families morn their deaths

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Knock knock Whose there? 4

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What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Astyanax mexicanus, a subspecies of Mexican tetra that lives in a subterranean habitat and as such has structurally degenerate eyes that have atrophied over the course of evolution.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

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What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops