Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Gustavo Andrade

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One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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Chick Norris... Enough said

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Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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OMG did you hear about the man who sky-dived from mars?!!!! No…. Me neither

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One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

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What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops