Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

Why was the man burying his child? because in france, fishing is only allowed 3 times a day

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

why is brennan hart a dumbass idk ask his mom

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

don't do anything i wouldn't do first

Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

Chris is hairy

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

Knock knock It's open, come in

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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