What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

thumb_up thumb_down -22

it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Wanna hear a riddle? Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops