Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

what did the 14 year old boy get for christmas? nothing because he his sitting in prison for killin his parents and is serving a life sentence.

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

Two muffins are cooking in the oven, they say nothing to one another as muffins can't talk

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

What do you call a black and white ruler? Barack Obama.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

what's the funniest joke? wish i knew

How many TV shows are there? A lot.

Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

Knock Knock Who's there? Well why don't you open the door and find out!

whats purple, extinct, and smells like children? barney

Q: Why was the gorrilla arrested? A: He broke a law.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

Is that a banana in your pants or do you just have an abnormally large penis?

A wise man once said...... I am a wise man

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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