Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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There was once a little boy... Boy: Daddy, I am so proud of you that when I grow up I want to be just like you! God: Son how dareth thou! That is a horribleth and shameful wish! I just called the adoption agency thy areth noteth my... er.. sonneth anymoreth! NOW GO TO HELL! Oh, and you get same powers as I by the way, just for Good measure or something, except I can destroy you whenever I want, I just do not want to because your evil will hopefully make me look good in comparison after I rid the world of the first testament anyways :P Boy: Yay? :( Where is hell by the way? Moral: That little boy grew up to become... SUPERMAN! While Satan never discovered what hell was since its a concept added by corrupt priests around the 1700`s in order to scare people into following their God instead.

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What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

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Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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My Nan, that is all.

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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the WNBA.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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