You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

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One more note for my children: ...My words appeal to your dark, evil side, it is that which might trigger your fear and disgust... But dont blame your fear on me you moron... ....To those that react with fear and disgust towards my comments: You know the fear and disgust in you, your own emotions make you feel fear and disgust for yourselves, because like all and everything that feels the inspiring words of the Black Angel... ...You know you like it ;) The friendly Black Angel/R*pist: God can free you from the temptation I inspired in your heart, but why would you? Now, thumb this comment down, so you can feel "good about yourself" and suffer in life in order to become a slave and serve the one that made you suffer troughout life... You think me, yet you fail to see that if it where me, I would have be Jehovah your GOD!... ...Worry not though, all of those that plan to stick alive for 10-15 years and I allow to live, will get to serve The Only God, your EMPEROR: Moral Man... Know my name and fear it, and yes mortal, you will also be screaming it...

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What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

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What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

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Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

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my egg roll

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What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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whats worse then falling out of a tree? Cancer.

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

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What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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You tell me. I have amnesia.

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What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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