What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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