Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

What do you get if you cross a fairy cake with some boiled parsnips? Fladgemuffin

So three Jews walk into a Biker Bar. Despite the fact that is was a self-proclaimed "Biker Bar", the group of men inside were in fact rather open-minded, and had no issues with new members. They had a rich conversation, and frequented the bar thereafter.

roses are red, violates are blue, you left me for David, I am about to kill you *bam* *bam**bam*

Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

Camerons hair is Curly..

Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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