What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

It was a chilly saturday afternoon coles's brother asked cole to baby sit cole said yes and when his brother left cole proceeded to give it to his niece in the ass. Little did cole know he said his little niece on fire that was the end of his little nieces life.

How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

What's black and white and red all over? Obama covered in red paint.

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

Why did the Chinese family eat a dog? Because they were poor and starving refugees.

what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

Why? Because.

A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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