a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

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Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

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So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

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Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

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pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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