Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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p

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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What did the black kid down the road get for Christmas? Your Bike.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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The chickens have become self-aware!

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying what's repetitive and really annoying

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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My cat just died.

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops