How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is your name? My name is Jeff

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what's funny about war? nothing!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

thumb_up thumb_down +4

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what is big and white? Your Mom

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why don't you want to shout "Hi" to your friend Jack on an airplane? Because he's deaf and will not hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because its rayseans favorite number

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

thumb_up thumb_down +2

(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops