What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? He got many things, because everyone felt bad for him. Someone even brought him into their house so he could have Christmas dinner. On Christmas Day someone gave him fifty dollars to spend on food for his family. Only thing is, he didn't have a family.

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Why did the snappy dresser take a button off of a coat? To see a button fly! NO YOU IDIOT YOU DID IT WRONG, IT'S SUPPOSED TO ABOUT ABOUT A "BUTTER FLY" OMG YOU DOLT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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i man walks into a bar, he is found dead two days later with severe head trauma.

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What does the kitty say to his owner? you've CAT to KITTEN right MEOW

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Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

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Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

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A man walks into a bar, and says "ow."

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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Read a Book.

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Why did the fat Jew cross the road? To go to the bicycle shop to fix his puncture

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What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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