When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra

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Why is my grandpa always so grumpy? Because he has diabetes and life is very difficult for him.

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How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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My cat just died.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops