your mom was so fat that she died.

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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Whats cold and frozen? ice

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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How do you drown a blonde? hold her head down until she stops breathing

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a blonde girl gets behind the wheel of a car. and drives to her community college for her morning class

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops