A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus? Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of african decent to sit in towards the front of a bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of european decent.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Will you please answer one question for me? "Yes" Thank you. -walk away-

thumb_up thumb_down -6

This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops