What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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