Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

Who's the fastest kid in AA

why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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