A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

cake cake and no cake, your life just ended

What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

A women left the kitchen.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

What do you call four black people in a car? A family road trip.

Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

No Nero, you see, a great man once told me that happiness is not something you look for and eventually find, but something that you decide that you already are.

Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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