a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

I <3 Hitler

I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

womens rights

Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

if you can read this you dont' need glasses

what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

Knock knock... Home invasion

We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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