What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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Jovan

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I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Kyle grund parker coffey

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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eoin burgin is fat

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Bill is driving along the Interstate.All the sudden, a refrigerator falls off the truck in front of him.The fridge slams into Bill's car.He dies instantly.

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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your so homosexual you go to a gay bar every couple of weeks so you get the social acceptance you need.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops