A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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how do you call someone? use a phone

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Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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Get up Look in the mirror

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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