Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

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What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

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A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

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Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

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A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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