Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

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Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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how do you make a cripple depressed? stairs..

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A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

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I ran out of anti-jokes. However, here's a cool math puzzle. 492 357 816 Using every number from 1-9, each row added up equals to 15, horizontally, vertically, and diagonally. Here's another cool word play TEA URN BAY Words horizontally are Tea, Urn, Bay Words vertically are Tub, Era, Any Words diagonally are Try, Bra

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY ATHORITAH RESPECT MY 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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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