Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

Iceland is actually green and Greenland is actually icy and Germany started the Holocaust.

What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

steven hawking walks into a bar

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

I'm homeless.

Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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