A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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Two black men walk past a white man who recently hung himself from a tree. Oh the racist irony.

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what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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autistic kids rock

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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