A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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Dwarf Shortage

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

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what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops