Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

thumb_up thumb_down -16

One spooky halloween night, three lonely outcasts walk down a dark street, no longer begging for candy. A cold wind blows through the night air and something rustles in a nearby bush one kid walks over to the bush and picks up his dog "OH THERE YOU ARE, BUDDY!"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

thumb_up thumb_down -16

yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

thumb_up thumb_down -16

q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

yo mama's so dumb, she had to retake the 11th grade.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops