What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

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Johnny just finished his pie.

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

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Rob Bell

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A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

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no

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

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A man hanged himself, leaving a note. Nobody found him, nor the note. Nobody cared for him.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

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What's big? Jupiter.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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