what makes white men feel embarrassed and and ashamed? when they find out their girllfriend has been sleeping with a black man.

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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Q. Why did billy die? A. Becuase everyone dies in life

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

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What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

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a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

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What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

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What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

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why did helen keller fall down the stairs A; i pushed her

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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Aodhan Hearty

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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