Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

An attractive naked woman walks into a bar. Everyone is surprised, and all the straight men, gay women and bi-sexual men and women in the bar are sexually aroused.

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

Guy 1 : what you watching? Guy 2 : a documentary on birds Guy 1 : can i watch it with you? Guy 2 : yeah sure go for it.....

A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

This joke isnt funny.

What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

i feel bad for black people (even though u can't consider them people)

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

gays

i like potatoes

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

knock, knock. use the doorbell next time.

How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

What's a rabbit's favourite food? No-one knows, like humans, every rabbit has it's own favourite food.

Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas. A: A specially modified coffin.

Let's write an anti-joke. K.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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