1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

does this look unsure to you?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Dana Cohen not having herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

yo mama's so fat, her medical weight chart is much steeper than those of most women her age

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between people with aids and people with cancer? People with cancer can get into heaven

thumb_up thumb_down +3

black people. that is all...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? ...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's a rabbit's favourite food? No-one knows, like humans, every rabbit has it's own favourite food.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did Suzy drop her ice cream? doesn't matter, why is she out of the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the man masturbate? Because there was no one who wanted to partake in sexual intercourse with him.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

thumb_up thumb_down -9

ghjwASFDJHKJZFKLJFHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHA GGGG DG FUC K DISLIKE ME!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops