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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

A man walks into a bar. [Insert punchline here.]

how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

I won the game.

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

Whats worse then a Republican? 9/11.

what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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