What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

Joke: two polar bears were in a bath tub. One said "pass the soap." And the other one said "no soap, radio!"

What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? She had no Arms or legs Knock knock Whos there? Not Sally XD XD XD XD XD XD XD

Dont read this joke

dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

What do you get a when you cross a chocolate bar and some haribo? A disease complex characterized by persistent hyperglycemia caused by insufficient insulin production or resistance to the metabolic action of insulin. Diabetes mellitus (DM) is generally classified as insulin-dependent (IDDM, type I), non-insulin-dependent (NIDDM, type II), or secondary diabetes mellitus

why did the chicken go to the man? TO ask if he wants sex for money

What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

A man and a women are having sex. He farted so she left before he came.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

Why was the man crying in prison? He missed his family and wanted to go home.

How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

A jewish boy walks past a quarter on the ground..

I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

Roses are red, Violets are violet They are not blue You stupid twat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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