Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

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There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

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What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why was the man afraid of the cat? Because he is allergic to cats and might die if he gets too close to it.

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A Black man walks out of a KFC.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

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What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

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Why do Jewish people where hats in church? They feel there head will often get cold

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

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Aodhan Hearty

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Hypothetical questions are a waste of time and you are not achieving your full potential by reading this during work.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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