What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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The chicken crossed the road.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a finger And the middle ones for you

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What's better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? No one. You have no friends.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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Knock Knock Business Man: Who's There? Al Qeada Business Man: Al Qeada who? Al Qeada is flying an airplane into your building Then a commercial airplane flew into the oddly placed door on the 95th floor of the North Tower. That's how 9/11 happened. Have a nice day.

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Religion

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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I have no joke. u mad?

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why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

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A Jew returns change.

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How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Statutory Rape.

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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