Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

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What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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What did the fish say when he hit the wall? A. Dam B. He Charlie I found the wall C. Both Well he didn't say both but he could have said A or B but it wouldn't make sense for him to say both.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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What's the difference between a person who can differentiate an anti-joke from a joke and one who cannot? Other than being able to tell the difference between the two types of humour, it is impossible to tell, as no further information is given.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

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Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? I dont have a bowling ball stapled to my tree

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Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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