What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Slug on ya tooth Gavin David Newman

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops