Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

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What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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Maths.

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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