How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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Q: What's a crutch's favorite song? A: Lean on me

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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My cat just died.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops