Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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What did Robin say to Batman before they entered the Batmobile? "Batman, I'm a necropheliac."

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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