why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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Knock Knock. Doors open

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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Barman says to a horse at the bar ' Are you sad or upset?' Horse says 'No' Barman says 'Well why the long face?' Horse says 'Because I'm a horse'

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops