Detroit has a low crime rate

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

thumb_up thumb_down -1

jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

L.A Clippers 2000-2012 season!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why do hummingbirds hum? They don't realize how annoying it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops