Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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womens rights.

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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Death by kayak

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops