a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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what do you call a gay guy? kevin

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Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Robin, get in the car, please.

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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