How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

Who is Dank? A: Billal

How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

quantum physics?

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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