What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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Lololol

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

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What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

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your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

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Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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A blonde is locked in a super-market. She dies.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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