Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

Do you want to hear a joke? No.

whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

How you know when dislextic

When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

Click here for free sandwich.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

Roses are red Violets are silly Grease up your flaps Cause here comes my willy!

What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

A japanese man enters a Honda dealership and is approached by an eager salesman. The salesman shows him a few models and then asks him curiously "What do they call Honda in Japan?" The japanese man answered "Honda"

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could DO YO MOMM!!!

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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