I'm called the! no i wish am I left

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boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

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Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What do you call a dead black man? A corpse.

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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if you don't like this you're gay

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knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

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What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

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A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops