how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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