Yo Momma so fat, that the doctor prescribed her prescription drugs that deal with her eating disorder and recommended that she begin a low calorie diet and live a more active lifestyle.

ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

What do Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

Yo mama is so ugly that she never got married or involved with anyone in her lifetime because everyone was to scared and ashamed to be around her. you're adopted

Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Arnold Schwarzenegger at Terminator: Gaynysis (or whatever I wont bother checking that out) YA NEED TO REMUV THE QUANTANAMO TRANSLACATOR TO RELOCALIZAYSEE THE INTERDEEMENENTIONAL MAYTREX! Yes, Pops but what about the time travel Paradox? YOU NEEED TO REMOV THE CRISTAL PALARDOXAL WARCALIBREITOR IN ORDA TO DESINSTONYSE THE DEEMENTIAL CORDALOXEY! Me: *Leaving the cinema* Moral: If you thought the trailer was like "meh", then you will soon realize it was the best part off the movie... The only part that is meh, and while I can honestly say I dont understand shit about how timelines work in Terminator (The creators dont do it either) Having Arnold Fucking Swartsnigger go with the Geek lingo DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! To explain things to me, NOTHIIIIING!

Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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