How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

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Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

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why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

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Why did Gavin kill Harley. Because his voices told him to.

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What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops