A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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What do you call a black person doing labor for other people? A good friend.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

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Why did the dog die? He was old

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

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why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

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What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

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Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

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What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a black person born in America? American.

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, it hurts when i poke my leg like this!" The doctor says,"Mm yes, it seems you have taken an arrow to the knee. You'll never walk again."

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

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whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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