Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

What long black and tasty? Licorice

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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