Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

Atheism

What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

what did the blind kid boy get for Christmas? he doesn't know because his parents are mute.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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