How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

thumb_up thumb_down -3

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the white man walk into the bar? He was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. want to hear the biggest lie in the world ? A. sure A.I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops