what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Dumb

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

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Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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Jesus saves, passes to Moses who shoots and scores!!!

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Why didn't the dog want to cross the road? there was a flea market on the other side.

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How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

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Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

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Women's Rights

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And now a word from our sponsors

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

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sadf

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white or wheat? wheat please.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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