what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

guess what what ...

A White, a Black, and a Hispanic man walk into a bar. They sit down and have a nice conversation, tip their bartender and then leave.

don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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