Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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