Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

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What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

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Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

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How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

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What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

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There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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