what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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like most people my age. im 27

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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star wars kid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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