what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

time to spruce up!

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Where's the soap?

Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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