How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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Why didn't suzie eat? Because she wasn't hungry

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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America

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

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what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

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Tucker Rivera

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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