If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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How you know when dislextic

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

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What happend to the dude who couldnt fart He blew up

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How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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