Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

Everybody love food when they are hungry

Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

So a man walks into a bar, right?

What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

What's the difference between a lamp?

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

What has two legs? Half a cat

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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