Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Ethiopian food.

Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

what did the white guy say to the black guy? nothing because hes racist and hates blacks people

A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...