what did the penguin say to the other penguin after they rolled down a hill, and fell into a pile of leaves then proceeded to go swimming, play basketball, go swimming again and then play ping pong and pool? nothing. penguins cant talk

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Burp

how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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