Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

like most people my age. im 27

I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

how do you know if an asian gang has been to your house? 1. your computer is unplugged 2. your homework is finished 3. they are still trying to back out of the driveway

How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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