Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

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Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "NUuhHUhhuUUUuhhhuuuuumph!"

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Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

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An american, a mexican, and an asian are on a boat. The boat is sinking because it is too heavy. The people decide to throw off things that they have a lot of in their country. The asian throws rice off the boat saying, "We have plenty of rice at home." The mexican throws tacos off the boat saying, "We have plenty of tacos at home." The american throws out the mexican saying, "We have plenty of mexicans at home."

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

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roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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rarw

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

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What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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How do u say hi to a black person JUST SAY HI RACIST

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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