Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

POOP.....People Order Our Patties

thumb_up thumb_down +14

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the man beat his wife? why not?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

thumb_up thumb_down +14

If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops