There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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why did the boy get hit by a bus because he dropped his ice cream

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Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

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Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

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What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops