How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

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What's worse then AIDS? Chad Wolbert

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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I named my son ps2 controller

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Diarrhea

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"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops