Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

Why did the man eat the apple? He had just witnessed a cow butchering and decided to become a vegitarian the moment he got home. He now lives in 1st degree depression because of what he saw 2 hours ago.

Robert Dupra getting a girlfriend.

your mom is so rude that she took her t shirt of and her bra of she was not naked how did she get so rude she drank till one brain cell was left

What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

What happened to the black guy that rammed his ankle against the bed frame? Yelled profusely until it stopped hurting.

What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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