Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

No it doesnt..

Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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