- Anti Joke

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

What time is it? 2:47 PM.

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.