If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

Jess Burns

A Black man walks out of a KFC.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

A white guy and a black guy are standing in a room. Which one of them is a murderer? I don't know, there is not enough information given in the question. However, according to Bureau of Justice murder statistics over the last 30 years, the black guy is 7.6 times more likely to be a murderer than a white guy in the United States.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

What's big? Jupiter.

What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

Penis

Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

A women walks out of a kitchen.

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

Oliver's friends

Lacrosse

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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