I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops