Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

what's worse than the holocaust the man who thought of it

what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

Maths.

Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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