What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

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What did god say when a black person was born? Damn I burnt one

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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What's funny? Nick Sotelo

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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