How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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How do you perform CPR on a black person. OK, first come down. I wish I could ask why you turned to Anit Jokes.com to ask this question, but this is serious. First, check for any air blockages using two fingers, then...

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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Hey, I just met you And this is Crazy I have Amnesia I like trains.

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Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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