if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

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Want to hear a joke? Sorry, you're looking at the wrong website.

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You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

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Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

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There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

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Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

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A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

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What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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