Women's rights

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Dana Cohen not having herpes.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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A man walks into a bar every night. He works there.

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What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

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What do apples taste like? Apples.

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

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whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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yo mama's so fat, her medical weight chart is much steeper than those of most women her age

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An English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man walk into a bar. I observed this from outside and therefore have no idea as to any of the sequence of events that occurred once they had entered the bar and disappeared from my line of sight.

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i feel bad for black people (even though u can't consider them people)

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

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where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

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what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

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Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

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knock, knock. use the doorbell next time.

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How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

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I have no joke. u mad?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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