whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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Knock Knock. Doors open

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How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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