Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

scraggle is in you pillow case

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Max Head fingered himself, HAH

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q. How do you drowned a blond A. Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

thumb_up thumb_down -10

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

thumb_up thumb_down -10

So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

thumb_up thumb_down -10

curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops