How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What type of jobs do black people have? That depends entirely on their qualifications and suitability to the relevant role.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops