How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

Hey how is your wife and my kids

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

why is 6 afraid of 7 7 is a registered sex offender

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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