What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

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Anti - Jokes. com

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Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

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Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

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Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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